There is no “standard treatment” for Shopping Addiction. But the first thing to do when you notice a problem is talk to somebody, preferably a professional. But anyone is acceptable. Tell someone, get it out in the open and start relying on other people to help you get past it.
There are however some changes in behavior that need to be made to start the process of overcoming the Addiction.
Changes that need to be made to overcome a Shopping Addiction:
- Admit that you have a Shopping Addiction or are a Compulsive Spender, whatever you call it, realizing it is half the battle. Like I have said before, I had heard it talked about but I never associated it with myself. I finally looked around my house and realized that I had so much stuff that I didn't need. That's when I realized I had a problem.
- Get rid of checkbooks, credit cards and debit cards which fuel the problem. Make it more difficult on yourself to fuel the Addiction. Just like an alcoholic is not going to walk around with a beer in his pocket, you should not carry your checkbooks, credit and debit cards. I tell everyone that my husband should have taken my checkbook away years ago. (Hence, not willing to take responsibility for my actions.)
- Tell someone, tell everyone you feel comfortable telling. Creating a support network will greatly increase your chances of overcoming this. I will tell everyone I meet. I am not ashamed as there is nothing to be ashamed about. This is a legitimate addiction and one that can be overcome with the help and support of friends and family. I even told my children, as they can be a great source of strength.
- Don't shop by yourself because most compulsive shoppers shop alone and if you are with someone you are much less likely to be spend. When you do go shopping, take a trusted friend and a shopping list. Your friend will be able to help you stick to the list. I will take my husband and he is useless in helping, he agrees to everything I say and hates to tell me no. I have found however that my 10 year old son is great in helping me stick to my goals and list. He has no fear of telling me to put something back and he can read, so he knows what is on my list.
- Make shopping lists and stick to them. If you have a hard time sticking to the list, send someone else to do your shopping with your list. Often I will send my husband to the store for me. This is very, very hard for me because I just can't imagine him getting the right stuff. However, it has been very therapeutic to allow him to do it and giving myself that freedom from control.
- Find other meaningful ways to spend your time. Ask someone else to do your shopping for you while you read a book or take a bicycle ride. I find that during the day, when I am between errands is a really difficult time for me not to go shopping. It's just me and the babies and it is so easy to just wander through stores to kill the time. However, I have found that almost anywhere I am, there is a park nearby for the kids to play at and it doesn't cost me a dime.
- Set goals and limits for yourself. A goal is great and can be very helpful in many ways but make goals with limits. Say I have $100 this week and that is all I am going to spend. That's your goal. Then set limits on yourself to achieve that goal. In that week go shopping only once and carry only cash. This will help you not only to reach your goal but to prevent you from falling back into the same patterns of the addiction. I talked in an earlier post about our new checkbook registers. That is our solution and so far it is working well.
Keep in touch for updates on my progress and other helpful tips to kick the Addiction!
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